All alone

Breathe again, I'm livin' on your air tonight

never knowing when you'll cut it off,

oh, you have a way

that makes it hard to sleep alone

and just when the dream gets good

you always seem to have to go.

So here I am, alone again

waiting for the story to finally end

while the world spins around,

it's out of my hands,

don't even try to understand,

and I guess it's time to tell you

what you should already know

oh, you know

I'm better breathing on my own...

all alone...

.
Usually I'm not a girl of second chances, but lately I've become someone I never thought I could -and I'm not sure if I ever wanted-be. Still, here I am after a long wait for something I already knew would never happen, just wondering why I chose to wait for it anyway.

The reason is quite obvious, I know it with every inch of my skin, and yet it is no acceptable. You see, I used to be this unpenetrable shield, this unreachable stronghold capable of doing whatever it takes to see things through, to get what I want...nothing, no one really mattered but me, but now most of that is gone.

I used to be the kind of girl that never gives second chances, that never holds on to something for too long, that never keeps hopes up for useless dreams, but now I seem to have thrown all that away, coldness has been bend.

Somehow I'm not angry, guess it is because I already knew this would happen, but it disappoints me to realize to how extent I've leaved the real me behind; I want her back.

That's the really big change here, not so long time ago I would have given everything to have him back, now the only thing I'm fighting for is to be who I used to be far away from all this crap.

Yes. I still have feelings for him, but for the first time since he crashed into my life they are not stronger than the ones I have for miself, and I intend to keep it that way from now on...no matter who may come or go away.

Nunca la misma...

Amanece otro día soleado vibrante de verano
en el invierno de una ausencia,
me agobian los recuerdos, pesa la impaciencia,
y me llega un murmullo de impotencia que huele a soledad.
.
Me enamoro de la vida
por desenamorarme del pasado
y encuentro que a mi lado me urgen a volar,
¡tanto lo he intentado!, caída tras caída
encuentro alas que dormidas se niegan a olvidar.
.
Vago sin dirección, muy cierta del camino,
sabiendo que el destino no se haya en su mirar
cada noche intención que quemo en el olvido
y resurjo de mis cenizas al alba lista a luchar.
.
Ya no finjo alegría, me he llenado la vida de razones
emociones encontradas estremecen mi andar,
entendida encontré que los corazones
se deben encerrados pues condenados se hayan a amar.
.
A brazos abiertos al viento me arrojo sin dudar,
acaricia mi piel que lleva su nombre
nuestros momentos y mis lamentos guardo en un sobre
que enviaré con tu imagen al fondo del mar.
.
Dulce partida, ahora soy yo quien se marcha,
murió la agonía que tanto amor hubo de llorar
con fuerza a su estrella se aferra, se alza
nunca la misma, la lección me ha de salvar...
...nunca la misma, advertida el alma no he de volver a entregar.

Sin ánimo de decir nada más...

Delta Goodrem-Not me,not I